Iv been working on the lines for about 2 yrs. The first yr of it I didn’t take it seriously as a job. Its only been in the last yr that I have thought hmmm maybe I can’t actually make money out of this. And so now I view what I do as a business, rather than a way of getting by.
I’m not saying I was shy and retiring beforehand. But! I have learned a few things about, life, sex, relationships and myself along the way. Prior to doing this work. I worked in mental health/homelessness/offending. I have worked with the more extreme within that field. I feel that gave me some skills to be able to do my current line of work.
- I have a none judgmental attitude
- Iv seen people go through trying to find out who they are sexually (coming out etc)
- I worked the pre-op transsexuals at it falls under mental health (at the time) in the UK
- I honed listening and counselling skills
- I have worked with sex workers around safety/sexual health etc
- I have listened to people just want to offload about who they are/want to be sexually
I knew that there were people with kinks fetishes out there. But I definitely did not know to what extent or extremes since I started my job. Its like there’s a scale that most people fit on. They just need to find out where they fit. I have learned that whilst some people feel completely comfortable and open about sex and sexuality. Not everyone does. I have also learned that some people aren’t really sure they have a kink until its revealed to them. Myself included.
In terms of myself. I guess you could say that I have always been seen as a dominant person by people in general. I am very direct, articulate, confident and very driven when I have a focus. I am extremely stubborn. Iv always been a fight the power kind of chick, and I never lost out when I was fighting for something I believed in.
In terms of relationships. I completely dominated my exs life in some ways without even realizing. And when it came to work I was a control freak. So I don’t know why it was such a shock to me that I like being power pissed, more so when men call or cam me. I realized via this role that I am dominant sexually too! I love it! Plus I have a particular fascination with feminization. I also realised that I like the fear of getting caught or being watched. Who knew! hehe
But in relation to my callers I have learned the following
- Be honest with yourself and others around you (partners) about sex and sexuality. Communication is something that seems to lack in so many of the callers relationships. If you don’t its you that misses out. If they don’t accept you, they weren’t they right for you in the first place? (I know that sounds condescending but it’s just my view) if they do, happy times!
- Be accepting and proud of who you are, you don’t need anyone’s approval to have a kink or just want to fuck more.
- You only live once, fuck it! Literally
- You can’t judge a book by its cover, you can never tell
- Try new things you just might surprise yourself
- Men are horny fuckers! (so are some women obviously)
So the strange thing and the thing I expected the least, was that something that I first did in the beginning as a way of getting by and having a bit of fun. Turned out to be a journey of discovery! and understanding. Its given me a view into mens sexual psyche, why my last relationship went wrong. What I actually want from a man rather than what I thought I did.