I really thought about whether I was going to tell this story. This call happened last wk. It’s rare that I get a call that is for support, but I do get them from time. this is just a short synopsis of what the call was about. Obviously there are things I shouldnt put in. It made me feel terrible after I put the phone down. And I’m desperate for her to ring me back.
Sex and sexuality can be confusing at the best of times. But imagine being born with both male and female sex organs. That’s the situation this caller was in. Her personal identity was female.
She didn’t want to have the “sex” chat that ordinarily clients do. She just wanted to talk. She was so low. She really struggled with her identity and sexuality. She just wanted to live her life without people judging or making comment. She explained that she found relationships difficult. And often found meeting men very difficult. How do you tell people you’re a freak? She asked (my heart sank) I tried to reassure her and point about what’s wrong with society, how special she is. And that things will get better. She seemed to agree.
Until she dropped them bombshell she had been physically abused by men. Because she is different (a freak fuck she called it) Obviously I told her how wrong that was. To get the police involved, seek counselling etc.
But shockingly she said it was part of her life and she accepted it. (WTF) she didn’t wanna go down that route as she had learned it never helps but makes matters worse. I have no idea if she thought about what I had said or for what I thought she should do….
We chatted for about an hour. About her life, what she wants from it and what would help her.
Then she left. I felt so bad for her, I know there isn’t much I could have done, but I would have liked to. I hope she rings back I just want to make sure she is ok.